LARP workout (or gamer workout, or min-max workout)

You want to get in shape to pwn faces at a larp?  I can help.

To put this in perspective, I’m sitting at 270 lbs. as of this writing.  270 pounds of shit in a 200 pound bag.  Nevertheless, I can fight and fight and fight.  The heat does gets to me more than it used to when I was lighter, but I’m outwinding most folks a lot younger and definitely a lot lighter.

How?  I do a lot of cardio.  For fitness newbs, I’m gonna drop two terms on you, LISS and HIIT.


LISS stands for Light Intensity Steady State.  When most folks talk about cardio, they talk about this.  LISS is getting on the elliptical for 20 minutes while watching a sitcom.  LISS is also running a marathon.  It pretty much means getting your heart rate up to X and keeping it there.

LISS has a lot of pluses, the main one being that it is easy to start with no equipment but running shoes.  Stretch for 5 minutes, and start jogging.  It is also hard (but not impossible) to injure yourself with LISS.

Unfortunately, it’s boring as hell for a lot of people.

How to Min-Max your LISS like a gamer

Use a heartrate monitor.  These are cheap, and strap under your boob/moobs.  They now bluetooth sync with your smartphone, and most exercise machines at the gym.

You min-max this by staying in a heartrate range for your workout.  Google that shit, I’m not repeating it here.

This gives you the best cardio workout effects, and also has the side benefit of making it slightly less boring as you watch your heart rate attempt to dive below your target number and you start pumping that shit up.


HIIT stands for High Intensity Interval Training.  (it also goes by “wind sprints” or Tabata if you want to google this stuff).  In it’s purest form, you go as hard as you can at a cardio exercise (for example – sprinting) for X seconds and then take a short break for Y seconds.

How to Min-Max your HIIT like a gamer

Use your smartphone and get a HIIT timer app.  I used to do HIIT back in the stone age (the 90s) with a handheld stopwatch.  The smartphones make it so much easier (and motivating).

You can also modify HIIT, however, to get some muscular benefits as well.  Currently I do a cycle that is:

  • Jumping Jacks
  • Pushups
  • Mountain Climbers
  • Air Squats

HIIT is the main reason I can outlast people in a LARP fight at this weight.  HIIT makes you learn to breathe while exerting yourself, and seriously stresses your short-term endurance.


Do Squats and Pushups.  Period.

(1)  Both use more muscles than you can count.  Pushups somehow uses your lats (back), and significantly.  Ass-To-Grass squats hit almost everything from the ribcage down.

(2)  Both will teach you breathing, or rather, teach you to puke because you suck at breathing.  Both of these exercises constrict your diaphragm, making it hard to breath during certain parts of the motion.


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